Originally, they are texts, doctrines, and rituals, made up of rules, and based on the use of all the positive energies that animate man. It is therefore a question of rigorous discipline, of work on oneself. Etymologically, it is the conjunction of two Sanskrit words: tanoti which means expansion, and trayati, liberation, which gave the word tantra, “expansion-liberation”.
Not related to sex, you will tell me? Yes and no, as Gordon White David explains in Kiss of the Yogini: “We wanted too much to see a ritualization of sexuality, whereas it is the sexualization of ritual”. Today, therefore, this could translate into a set of rules aimed at promoting the release of sexual energies, but also sharpening and deepening one’s consciousness using practical techniques. It is once again linking the body to the spirit or, more accurately here, the spirit to the body.
Why Tantric Sex?
So that Shiva and Shakti (symbol of the universal mother and lover of the creator god) are karmically disposed to each other. The goal: to go further, to blossom, to develop their sexual, sensual, and sensory experiences.
In fact, it is above all the man who learns to control himself to have orgasms without ejaculating, deeper, sometimes even successive, but also to satisfy his partner by making the pleasure last.
3 Ways To Control Your Sexual Energy
Desire is at the heart of this research because you have to learn to control your sexual energy. There are a thousand ways to do this, I’ve selected three below, and Daisy Le Corre, the co-author of this blog, has tried others.
Strengthen your penis: The exercise involves holding a towel over his erect penis to harden it, a kind of genital weightlifting. The testicles and perineum also strengthen.
Strengthen your vagina: thanks to contractions of the perineum or geisha balls, erotic sensations are intensified.
Resist the call to orgasm: alone or with your partner, try to delay orgasm to increase your potency. For this exercise, when arousal is at its peak, take a deep breath and contract the muscles to stop ejaculation or orgasm. To be repeated several times (nine times according to Chinese precepts). At two, count ten seconds into each other without movement. It’s about controlling the pressure in your body.
Tantrism In Duet, By Daisy Le Corre
On the web, tantric sexuality tutorials don’t come out of thin air. I still tried to follow a few tips with my other half, although it was not recommended to do the activities together. With hindsight, I understand why. We decided to follow these tips inspired by the Guide to Tantric Sex (Jouvence ed.) To “stimulate our sexual energy”:
First Exercise: Back And Forth Movements With Your Pelvis
“Standing in front of a mirror, hands on your waist, legs apart and slightly bent, rock back and forth with your pelvis, back and forth – like during sex. Concentrate on your breathing. . Inhale as you arch and exhale as you project your pelvis forward. ”
In fact, it was complicated! First, because seeing the other make a back and forth movement in front of their mirror triggered a giggle a thousand places from the long-awaited ecstasy, but above all, because you have to put yourself in tantric condition. It cannot be improvised! My advice: light candles, close your eyes, calm your breathing already before you start anything, choose sultry music. And get completely naked. It helps.
Next Step: Self-Caressing The Nipples
This consists of “using the palm of your open hand (called the palmar chakra) to stimulate her nipples in a circular fashion”. So, of course, if you are not in a slightly zen-erotic atmosphere, forget it! But, if you follow the advice well, it ends up having a small effect. The gesture is pleasant, and you learn to touch yourself gently as you don’t do that often.
Last Exercise: The Cat Position
Then comes the time to mimic the cat’s position: “Get on all fours and curved your back like an angry cat, then arch back, conversely, like a horse”. This exercise aims to stimulate the sex glands. In the end, it relaxes, it stretches and it makes you want to ask the other to give us a message and more if that is the case.
While these three little exercises weren’t enough to totally free our chakras, they made us want to go further. Two hours a week is apparently the ideal time to devote to tantrism as a couple. We have already started reading these tips for beginners.
We also realized that we were practicing techniques in spite of ourselves.
Tantric, namely over-communication (often telling each other what you like about the other), the permanent search for physical contact with the other (not necessarily sexual), the practice of ordinary massages that drift into sexy massages, the importance of looking into each other’s eyes, bathing or lighting candles to relax the atmosphere, etc.